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Cathy's Gift A celebration of a family caregiver by our CEO Deanne Martin-Soares. Jun 02, 2009 I have the great fortune of meeting new people almost each and every day and often have been on the receiving end of some truly inspiring stories. Take for instance a woman I met on one of my out of town trips.
Cathy’s mother-in-law suffered a severe stroke that left one side of her body completely flaccid (she could not bear weight and had no functional use of that side of her body) and she had very limited communication skills. At that time the only options to the family was convalescent care or taking her home. The decision was made that Cathy would take care of her mother-in-law and be responsible for organizing her care. It is interesting to note that, at the time, Cathy was not well liked by her mother-in-law and was made well aware of it on many occasions throughout her marriage.
For the first few years of her role as caregiver, Cathy found it difficult to find caregivers and she would often do the direct care herself. At the time, many companies could not help because of the level of care and the lack of training required due to the complexity of her care. Frequently they would hire private caregivers, but would experience issues involving improper care, theft, problems associated with the employer/employee relationship as well as the financial burden. Soon after, Cathy became overwhelmed with the responsibilities of her role including the physical and mental stress that comes with caring for a family member. Finally, she could not handle the burden placed upon her and demanded the help of the other family members.
Cathy continued to provide care to her mother-in-law throughout the subsequent years and had come to the realization that every person has his or her limits and nobody can do it all. Cathy learned many aspects of proper care from a very caring and skilled caregiver that she once hired. She learned how to set up a routine for care, a recipe for “Power Pudding” to avoid constipation and safety tips to avoid injury to both herself and her mother-in-law.
Cathy’s mother-in-law passed away and although she was never able to verbally communicate, I know that she was aware of the great gift Cathy had given her throughout those seven years of providing care. Nobody can ever understand the amount of energy it takes to care for a loved one unless they have been in a similar situation themselves.
What’s the moral of the story? What’s the reason for telling you about Cathy? Perhaps because there are many Cathys or Bettys or Jims or Steves in this world, who give themselves to their ill family members so that they can live out their days in this world with dignity and surrounded by love. The demand is great and often goes without thanks, but it is done because people like Cathy care and would want the same treatment should they fall ill. It is one of the greatest gifts one can ever receive. |
